


Here With Me

by BehindTheRobinsMask



Series: Knowing you, loving you [5]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, Nightwing (Comics), Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst, Awkward Conversations, Confessions, Difficult Decisions, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Understanding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-14
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2021-03-07 05:55:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26468299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BehindTheRobinsMask/pseuds/BehindTheRobinsMask
Summary: Dick's heat comes around and he has a conversation with an old friend.
Relationships: Dick Grayson & Roy Harper, Dick Grayson/Jason Todd
Series: Knowing you, loving you [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1908331
Comments: 10
Kudos: 129





	Here With Me

**Author's Note:**

> Song: Here With Me by Elina

Slamming the door behind him, with shaking fingers, Dick put all the locks in place, refusing to take any chances despite how much his body screamed in pain. His skin was burning, the flames churning in the pit of his stomach and spreading through his being like wildfire. Higher and higher the heat would rise, higher and higher he would fly, stripping out of his uniform, stumbling to his bed and hoping for his mate’s touch. But just like always, his nest lay empty, only old clothes left to sate his need. And just like always, his omega howled, baring its teeth, threatening to rip Dick apart from the inside if it wasn’t given what it wanted.   
  


But Dick had never been one to give in to threats. He wouldn’t bow down to anyone. Not even to himself. So, gripping a red t-shirt he had stolen from Jason’s room during his last visit to the manor, Dick smiled, baring his own teeth, accepting the challenge and all its terms. Even though his heat worsened every time it came around, even though the pain just kept on increasing, piling onto him, forcing him to submit, he fought back. He would not be brought down to his knees. Not this time. Not ever.   
  


Never again.

*******

As work ended for the night, Jason leaned back in his chair and wondered how Dick would feel about moving back into his old room. Not that he had decided whether he wanted to stay in the manor or continue working from his safe house. But Jason wanted to be prepared just in case, be prepared to welcome him home, be prepared to see him every day for as long as he could. He never thought such a day would come when Dick would be in his life for more than a few fleeting moments, always taken away by the wind before Jason had the chance to reach out and hold him. Before he had the chance to savour his touch, his kiss, the look in his blue eyes. And now, he would be close that Jason could feel himself panicking like a teenager with a crush. He didn’t know how to act. He didn’t know how to breathe. His mind was a jumbled mess of wants and needs, of fears and doubts.   
  


All he wanted was to do things right this time.   
  


But for now, he had to keep himself together. After all, the cave doors were opening as the batmobile pulled in. Dick and Damian were back for the night. If Jason played it cool, if he didn’t push too much, maybe he could get Dick to stay at the manor.   
  


“Todd,” Damian greeted, getting out of the driver’s seat and Jason furrowed his brows.   
  


“Where’s D--Batman?” Jason asked, trying to keep his cool but his mind was already in shambles, thoughts stirring up a storm of worry because Dick wasn’t here. He wasn’t here and Jason didn’t know why.  
  


The last time he checked in, everything had been fine. Batman and Robin had just wrapped up the mission and were on their way back to the cave. What had changed in that duration? Did Dick decide to leave on his own without informing Jason?  
  


“Grayson had to leave,” Damian answered, eyeing Jason from head to toe. “His heat came earlier than expected.”  
  


“What?! You let him go alone?!”  
  


Sighing, Damian peeled off his domino mask, “Grayson is more than capable of taking care of himself. But no, I dropped him back before picking up the batmobile and coming back. Everything happened fast so we did not have the time to inform you.”  
  


“Right okay,” Jason said, finally breathing. But his heart wouldn’t calm down. It barely had in the past few days. “Does he need anything or--?”  
  


_ Does he need anything from me? _ is what Jason wanted to ask.  _ Should I go over? Should I be with him? Does he need me at all?  _ But he would never say those words out loud, already knowing what the answer would be. Dick had refused the mating bite long ago and if the two of them were to meet while he was in heat, Jason would not be able to stop himself. There were always those parts of heats and ruts that omegas and alphas couldn’t remember clearly as they gave in to their instincts completely. So, Jason bit his tongue and ignored his wolf that wanted more.   
  


For a while, Damian stared at Jason as if deciding whether he was worthy of knowing the answers to his questions. On most days, the two of them were close, trusting each other with everything. But then, when it came to Dick, Damian would just shut down, so overprotective of the omega that he’d doubt the people he trusted with his life. Jason wasn’t offended though. He was glad that Dick had someone like the pup in his life.   
  


“The heat came unexpectedly so if you could ask Pennyworth to bring Grayson some supplies. Maybe food,” Damian finally answered, eyes shifting to the floor for a second. “Maybe those stuffed mushrooms he likes.”  
  


Jason couldn’t help but smile at that, his hand reaching out to ruffles Damian’s hair.  
  


“I’ll make sure all of Dick’s favourite food is packed and sent to him,” he said, already making a list in his head. 

  
Dick didn’t need to know that he was the one cooking the food.   
  


“Get your hands off me, Todd!” Damian growled and stomped away like an angry puppy, his cheeks pink.   
  


Chuckling to himself, Jason headed upstairs because now he had work to do. But first, he needed to make an important call.

*******

Being an omega never really bothered Dick. In fact, it was something he had been prepared for since he was a child since his mother had been one herself. And he had been brought up in a house where there were no differences because of secondary genders, a house which was full of respect and love. But then again, that was probably also because his father was a beta and never had the inane need to dominate someone. Instead, he was calm and gentle, the one who spoke highly of omegas, the one who taught Dick that there was never any reason for him to be ashamed of who he was and who he could be.   
  


Sometimes Dick wondered how different his life would have been, how different he would have been if his parents had never died. If he had never met Bruce Wayne. While Bruce called it a way of channelling anger, when he wore the mask of Robin, he saw himself as a way of keeping Batman human, a tether that kept him bound to the light. But then, if he never stepped into Wayne Manor, he would have never known Jason, the chances of their paths crossing becoming slim to none. Maybe they could have had a better life, met in a time when they were whole instead of broken people trying to find pieces of themselves. Despite being different people, they would have loved each other, Dick was sure of that. There was no rendition of him that could ever love anyone the way he loved Jason, no part of him that could want anyone more. But it was only in daydreams that they could have a future together.   
  


As a new wave of pain wracked through his body, biting down on his lower lip, Dick let out a muffled groan. His omega was more agitated than usual, demanding control that he wasn’t willing to give up because he knew what would happen if he did. This was the worst way of handling his heat but it was better than being dependent on suppressants. He hadn’t tried those since his operation, afraid of the possible side-effects. While Dick did ignore his omega a lot, he didn’t want it gone. They were two parts of one whole and they could not survive without each other. It was easier to endure than to lose another piece of himself.   
  


Right now, though, he would give anything to shut his omega up, even if it was for a little while. He needed food and sleep, both of which had been scarce with the pain keeping him awake and making him throw up. A few more days. This was just a matter of a few more days but Dick couldn’t help but have those small moments of weakness, ones that had him reaching for his phone and dialling a familiar number. He was only human and sometimes he missed Jason too much. 

  
With the wave intensifying, another moment of weakness came by and Dick wondered if it would be okay to call. If it would be okay to hold Jason and never let go. Would that be so wrong? Was wanting so wrong? And it was then that he heard the sound of the door opening. There was someone in the safe house, someone who knew how to deactivate his alarms. Dick shouldn’t have been hopeful. He shouldn’t have been excited but he was. And so was his omega. Grunting and groaning, he pushed himself to his feet, stumbling across the floor and out of his room only to be disappointed.   
  


“Damn. I’m sorry I can’t be Jason,” Roy said, setting down a few packages on the table.  
  


“What are you doing here, Harper?” Dick growled, sitting down because he really couldn’t stand anymore. False hope no longer gave him the hope to keep going.   
  


“Jason called me,” Roy answered as he looked for something in his bag. “He was worried about you and wanted you to have someone who actually understands your situation.”  
  


It was then that he took out a few medications and suppressants from his bag, ones that had Dick pulling away. No. He would not use those.   
  


“Calm down,” Roy snapped. It was like he could read Dick’s thoughts. But then again, at this time, keeping up a poker face took strength that he didn’t have. “These are safe. In fact, they’ll help keep your omega calm.”  
  


“How do you know?” Dick asked, narrowing his eyes.  
  


“Because they were made for people like you.”  
  


The answer burned because Jason had told Roy. It wasn’t that Dick expected Jason to keep this secret forever, to never breathe a word of it. He only shared because it was time for people to know. Time for people to see just how serious he was about his mission. Just the thought of Jason going to Roy before anyone else bothered him.   
  


When Dick presented for the first time, when he found out just what Bruce thought of omegas, he felt like there was no one he could turn to. While he could talk to Jason, being an alpha, he would never really understand. That’s when Dick met Roy Harper who went back Speedy at the time. They were both omegas stuck with dumbass alpha partners, one who could be too prejudiced without meaning to and the other who had foot in the mouth disease, constantly saying things he shouldn’t. While Bruce didn’t really try to understand Dick, Oliver tried a bit too much, driving Roy insane with how pushy he could be. Because of everything they had in common, they became friends in no time. Best friends. And Dick had never had one of those before. He had Zitka at the circus but she wasn’t really much of a talker and labelling Jason as a friend would be so unfair. The relationship he had with Roy was special and then, it was non-existent. The choice had been Dick’s because he had something he had to do, something he had to prove. Roy, on the other hand, had his own life, his pack and most of all, his pup Lian. Dick decided they would be better off without each other. Though a part of this decision was made because during his absence, Roy and Jason had grown close, almost as close as Roy used to be to Dick. He felt replaced. Forgotten. And seeing how happy Roy was with Jason, he found it easier to leave than to stay.   
  


Roy and Jason, they were both good people. They didn’t deserve to have someone like Dick in their lives.   
  


Last he had heard, Roy had settled down with an alpha and was living a blissful life, though he was very much involved in the vigilante business.   
  


“Was I not supposed to know?” Roy asked, unable to read Dick’s expression.  
  


“It’s nothing like that.” Dick shook his head. “I just didn’t think… nevermind.”  
  


But Roy knew what Dick was about to say, “You didn’t think I’d care enough to come.”  
  


“I didn’t--” Dick started but Roy held up his hand as he prepared a shot for Dick to take.  
  


“Save it, Grayson. You might be the big bad Bat but deep down inside, you’re still the fool I grew up with. Now hold out your hand,” Roy said.  
  


Staring down at the needle, Dick chewed on his lower lip, a bit apprehensive. He really didn’t want to depend on drugs. He didn’t want to make things worse than they already were. But he was worried that if he kept pushing the way he was, one day, he’d just be too exhausted to fight back.   
  


“Come on, man. I don’t want to have to wrestle you down,” Roy said, breaking into Dick’s thoughts.  
  


“I’d like to see you try, Harper.” Dick grinned but he did as he was told.   
  


“I wouldn’t be so confident, Dickie. You’re not the only one running around with a new identity,” Roy teased and it was almost like they were back to being kids.   
  


“Red Arrow,” Dick said without wanting to. Usually, he would have feigned ignorance but today, he clearly wasn’t thinking things through properly. “You’re Red Arrow now.”  
  


For a moment, Roy stared at him, “You’ve been keeping tabs on me.”  
  


“I keep tabs on everyone.” Dick just shrugged which was partially true. But he kept up with what Roy was doing for other reasons. Not that he’d ever admit it.  
  


Without saying another word, Roy gave Dick the shot, making him flinch and look away. But soon enough, the drug began to do its work, spreading relief through his system as the waves of pain slowly dissipated. Dick could finally think. He could finally breathe without hating himself. And while he expected his omega to disappear, it was still there, only calmer now.   
  


“Works like magic, doesn’t it?” Roy asked with a smile. “Told you I could help.”  
  


“How do you have this?” Dick asked. He knew full well that Roy never had the operation done. It just wasn’t for him.   
  


“You’re not the only omega trying to change the world,” Roy responded with a shrug and started to unpack the food. “Now come here. Let’s get some food in your system.”  
  


Even though this was his home, Dick moved across the floor hesitantly because he just didn’t know how to behave around Roy Harper. The world he could fool. The world he could bring to his feet. But just like Jason, Roy was different in his own right. In silence, the other omega plated up the food, set it for Dick and started eating like they weren’t estranged friends. Like this was the most normal thing in the world.   
  


“What about Lian?” Dick asked, hating the way silence weighed down on his body.   
  


“She’s staying with Kori and Donna. They’re teaching her how to be a badass,” Roy answered, glancing up. “Though she told me to tell you that you still owe her those trapeze lessons.”   
  


It was such a strange thing. After his resurrection, Dick couldn’t be around Roy, couldn’t see him, couldn’t be his friend. But somehow, Lian had managed to worm her way into his heart, pushing relentlessly until he gave in. Then again, how could he ever say no to her little smile? Dick just had a soft spot for her. The amazonian Artemis, someone he had met during his travels, had told him that he was only capable of befriending pups because real people mostly wanted to kick his ass. Dick had wanted to rip her head off. Not that he’d ever do it. If there ever was an omega to look up to, it was Artemis, strong, resilient and powerful enough to bring anyone down.   
  


Though they hadn’t spent a lot of time together, Dick had learned a lot from Artemis and not just about fighting. She was the first asexual omega he had met, someone who shared parts of his experience and had her own battles to fight. She experienced the mental and physical exhaustion that came with heats, the pain, the weakness and the need to hide away from the world until the period passed. But she never had a desire for things like sex or knots. Maybe affection at most. It was Artemis who taught Dick how to handle his heats without suppressants or medication of any kind. It was Artemis who gave him the push he needed to follow his dreams while she followed her own.   
  


Sometimes he wished she was here. But that would mean admitting that he thought of her as a friend and he wouldn’t do that.   
  


After giving Roy a nod, Dick silently reached for his food, afraid that he’d say something stupid again. Afraid that he’d give away more of his secrets without wanting to. Roy already knew more than he should have and they were not about to have a bonding moment. But then, one bite and Dick could feel his resolve break, shatter like glass, pieces crashing before he had a chance to catch them. Before he had the chance to keep himself together and not let his feelings bleed through. They did, slipping from his eyes and down his cheeks. They did when he took one bite after another, ignoring the way Roy watched him.   
  


No one had to say a word or drop any hints for him to know that the person who had made all this food for him was Jason. As always, he’d gone out of his way to help Dick. He’d gone out of his way to express his love in the subtlest yet loudest way possible, each bite bringing back memories that Dick thought about every night, the simpler times, the peaceful days where they could love each other and not be afraid. Dick missed him. He missed Jason so damn much.   
  


“You should talk to him, ya know,” Roy said, voice low. 

Sniffling, Dick didn’t even make an attempt to wipe away his tears, “Shut up, Harper.”

*******

Sometimes Jason felt that patience was a hard thing to come by, especially when his wolf was all over the place, constantly whining, constantly growling because it wanted nothing more than to be with his met during this time. He wanted to hold Dick, kiss his lips and take care of him. He wanted to protect him and make sure that he comfortable in his nest during his heat. There were other things the wolf wanted but Jason didn’t want to think about that. It really wasn’t appropriate. And he had work to do because until the week passed, Gotham was his responsibility.   
  


So for the next few days, Jason flew around Gotham while thinking of Bruce’s face because nothing killed his mood faster.   
  


Somehow he got through it all. Somehow, by the grace of god or a mage who took pity on him, he had discovered patience. But that had run out the moment he heard that Dick was on his way to the manor and now he was pacing so fast that Alfred was afraid he’d burn through the carpet. He just didn’t like the idea of Dick travelling so far right after his heat was over.   
  


“Master Jason, please. Those carpets are new while your worry over things that Master Dick has done a million times is not,” Alfred sighed, unimpressed by Jason’s antics.   
  


Opening his mouth, Jason was about to apologize when the doorbell rang and he was running, making the butler sigh once again.   
  


He ran his fingers through his hair, patted down his clothes and then opened the door, smiling as casually as possible. But the person standing on the other side was Damian who much like Alfred was unimpressed.  
  


“Oh. Hey,” Jason said, stepping aside to let Damian in.   
  


But the one to follow Damian in wasn’t Titus. It was Dick.   
  


“Have I told you that you’re just adorable, Jay?” He grinned, his words making Jason blush with embarrassment.   
  


Unable to meet Dick’s eyes, Jason cleared his throat, “So, how are you?”  
  


“Much better. Roy… helped a lot,” Dick answered, having a hard time admitting the last part.   
  


Jason felt his lips twitch upward but he quickly faked a cough to hide his smile. He knew that would just piss Dick off. He loved Roy but he simply refused to admit it.   
  


“Are you going to start patrolling from tonight?” Jason asked, changing the topic but Dick shook his head.  
  


“No. I’m actually here for something else,” Dick answered, a bit hesitant. “Can we talk in private?”  
  


Nodding, Jason led him to his room, locking the door when both of them were inside. He wondered what Dick wanted to talk about, a new wave of worry crashing into him.   
  


“This place really hasn’t changed,” Dick said, looking around, his fingers dancing over the covers of the books kept on Jason’s side table.   
  


“I guess I haven’t changed.” Jason just shrugged.

  
Looking back to him, Dick smiled genuinely, “You really haven’t.”  
  


And while the moment was sweet, the perfect chance to reminiscence, Jason couldn’t concentrate on that. Not when his thoughts were killing him.   
  


“What’s going on, Dick? Is everything okay?” he asked, resisting the urge to chew on his lower lip.   
  


With a nod, Dick sat down, “Everything is fine. I just… you know you didn’t have to make all those meals for me. I know how much time they take.”  
  


“I… I didn’t--” Jason tried to deny it but as always Dick saw right through him.   
  


“When will you stop being so nice to me, Jay?” he asked.  
  


Sighing, Jason saw down beside Dick, feeling himself back at square one. No matter what he did, Dick was always waiting for him to run, always waiting for some kind of rejection. It was just something he expected, maybe something he even worried about. And Jason wanted to do everything he could to convince him that this time he’d stay.   
  


“Do I have to?” Jason asked, his fingers laced together. “Can’t I just be nice to you for as long as we know each other?”  
  


“It just seems very exhausting. And unreasonably selfless. Because I can’t ever give you anything in return. I could love you but that won’t be enough forever. Someday, you’ll want me to take your bite. We’re mates. It’s the natural thing to do right?” Dick asked with a haunted smile. “But I don’t want that.”  
  


“Because that will change everything. It will change you and me, our relationship, the way we see each other,” Jason added, knowing exactly what was going through Dick’s mind. “So what if I don’t want you to take my bite?”  
  


“... What?”  
  


Surprise flickered through Dick’s face, his emotions shining through because while he prepared for every possibility, this was something he didn’t expect. This was something he couldn’t even imagine in his wildest dreams.   
  


“Yeah, we talked about a lot of things when we were kids but that’s the thing, Dick. We were kids. We didn’t know anything except what we had been taught. I’m older now and while somethings about me might be the same, I’m still a different person. And frankly, things like bond marks, heats and ruts, they mean nothing to me,” Jason explained, hoping that he could finally get through to Dick. “You mean something to me. And if you never wanted to carry my mark, that’s fine with me. Though maybe at some point, I’ll ask you to marry me but that’s only because I’m romantic like that.”  
  


A small gasp escaped Dick’s lips at that point, fingers hovering over his face as he tried to hide.   
  


“I don’t understand you,” he finally said. “I just don’t. I come here every time hoping to end things between us. But you just give me more reasons to stay. Even though you shouldn’t. Even though you’ll be better off without me.”  
  


Then he looked at Jason, staring right into his eyes, “You’re infuriating, Jason.”  
  


“Yeah, I’ve been told that many times.” Jason smiled, intertwining his fingers with Dick’s.   
  


“You’re the most annoying person I know.”  
  


“I’m not surprised.”  
  


“You're pretty fucking dumb!”  
  


“Probably am.”  
  


“I hate you!”  
  


Chuckling, Jason leaned his head against Dick’s, “Now, sweetheart, we both know you’re lying.”  
  


“Shut up,” Dick whispered, blinking away the tears in his eyes before leaning in and kissing Jason.   
  


Tomorrow, there was no doubt that he would go back to running. It was the only thing he knew how to do, the only way he knew how to keep himself safe. Because Jason was the only one who could break down his walls. Jason was the only one who could make him honest, see through his lies and unravel him within minutes. It was scary seeing someone have so much power over him. It was scary knowing the extent of love he felt towards Jason, the kind that ran deeper than he expected, deeper than he imagined.    
  


But for today, he just wanted to fly with Jason by his side.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, it's me the fool with more content no one asked for. Just a little bit more to go before the series reaches its conclusion.


End file.
